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Budget and Recap! 10/10/2020 West Point, NY downsized but glad we still had a celebration!

First of all Weddit thanks for all the input and help and ideas. It was great to have a place of sanity to go while we were planning this day for the last 2.5 years! Our wedding was incredible and while it wasn't the day we had originally wanted, it was perfect. I am so grateful that we were able to have our closest friends and closest family there. As we navigated our options with postponing we realized that it wasn't really an option for us. Due to my husband's job if we didn't have our celebration in October, it wasn't going to happen until at least fall 2022. We'd already been engaged for 2 years and we were both ready to move on. While postponing is the right option for some couples, we realized that there are a million reasons to celebrate so we wanted to do something this year and we can throw a huge party with everyone we love for an anniversary, birthday, big life celebration, or just because we want to.
I know that having a wedding at all right now is a controversial topic. I really don't want to have the conversation with anyone about the precautions we took. Among other things, every single person that attended had to have a negative test within 24 hrs. We did not invite friends/family that would have to travel and the one bridesmaid (bff) that did travel came in with us 3 weeks early so that we could all quarantine and test multiple times. We also had ample mask wearing, sanitizer, distancing of all seating, and everything was outside. Post wedding everyone tested again and everyone was negative. I do not want to engage with anyone on if it was the right thing to do.
THE BASICS
Date: October 10, 2020
Guests: originally planning for 225, ended up with about 50 once we cut the list down. There were a lot of family and friends that weren't invited to our smaller celebration.
Venue: The Historic Thayer Hotel at West Point
Pictures: https://imgur.com/a/DpcLVeX
What went not so right:
What went right:
BUDGET BREAKDOWN
I am doing my best to break down the budget as detailed as possible. We got married in a HCOL area and our original budget reflects the plan for a more traditional Jewish wedding, where parents were allowed to invite friends. It was important to us that everyone was there with us, our whole proverbial community and we knew there would be a premium paid for that. Once we downsized and added streaming I know there were ways to do it for less, but the quality of the virtual experience was important to us. I don't regret for one second what we spent on things, and we could've easily spent more.
I am putting this budget breakdown in because the two in my budget range that I saw when I was planning made me feel more sane. I really do not appreciate the budget shaming that often happens on this sub. It was hard planning in such a HCOL area where the national averages are not representative, so I do hope this can help anyone who is looking for what things really cost for a wedding of this size in and around NYC
One thing to note is that we got engaged in June 2018 and while we spent a lot of money, a lot of it was spread out over nearly 2.5 years. Day to day, the amount spent on the wedding didn't impact our budget and we did not go into any debt.
My parents contributed a set amount to the wedding and my fiancé's parents covered the rehearsal dinner. I am not including my engagement ring or the honeymoon in this because I have a rough idea of how much my husband spent on my ring, but I've never asked for sure and our honeymoon is not going to happen until the world opens up. We are planning on taking 2 big trips to double celebrate our honeymoon (and because since we're waiting, why not?) to Japan and then to South Africa and Namibia.
totals:
all totals include gratuities
initial budget: 80k
planned budget pre-covid: 100k
Total spent (including things that were not really in the budget) ~50k
Breakdown:
****Ceremony and Reception: ****
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****Appearances ****
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****Gifts and things people kept****
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****Misc****
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****Not counted in this budget ****
Dance Lessons: ~$600 This money would've been super well spent if I hadn't hurt myself. we still did dance a bit but it wasn't what we planned. One day we can use those skills. I actually had a great time at the dance lessons and I'd 100% do it again.
Pre Marital Counseling: ~$500 very much money well spent. We did 4 sessions with a counselor online in the weeks before the wedding. We both felt like we got some great tools and it was a fantastic outlet for conversations we needed to have. I liked that it was virtual which made it accessible and I feel like we could go back to that counselor if we ever needed it.
Ketubah: ~400, this was a Hanukkah gift in 2019
Smashing Glasses: ~200 this was a gift from my aunt who officiated the wedding.
Engagement Ring
Honeymoon
Post-Wedding Brunch - My parents paid for this, it was casual
Wedding Shoes: ~$400, I bought these incredible something bleu shoes Navy kitten heels and then glitter keds for the party. I ended up in a boot and a sneaker so womp. But luckily both pairs of these shoes aren't very "bridal" and i'm definitely planning on wearing the glitter keds to the next tech conference I go to. I don't consider these "wedding budget" things because I'll wear them other times as well.
Rehearsal dinner - MIL paid for this
I'm glad I can post this and happy to talk to any other brides/grooms who are in the midst of planning!
submitted by westpointwedding to weddingplanning [link] [comments]

Ideas Needed for a Picnic Wedding!

Oops, I’m a covid bride...
A picnic wedding reception wasn’t my original ~vision~ but I’m rolling with the punches. Postponing our wedding has made us realize how expensive our original plan was, so we’re rethinking everything as we try to find a celebration that will fit our budget.
Side note: We‘re not planning to do this until the pandemic has calmed down. My inner bridezilla hates all the waiting but I’m not willing to risk anyone’s health.
THE VIBE
I’m going for “garden party” as opposed to “rustic farmhouse chic,” but I also want things to feel laid-back and easy
THE LOCATION
A public park in the middle of my city
THE TIME
11:00 am following the 10:00 am ceremony at our church
THE DETAILS
• The menu consists of brunch-y finger foods like fruit skewers and bagels, mimosas, and cupcakes for dessert
• To save on a DJ, we’ll replace music/dancing with lawn games and other activities (croquet, hula hoops, a wedding cake piñata, a photo scavenger hunt with prizes)
• Seating will consist of picnic blankets, with chairs/tables provided for those who are physically unable to sit comfortably on the ground
• Flip-flop sandals as party favors will give people the option to change out of their heels
• A Selfie Spot instead of a photo booth will save so much money it’s actually OBSCENE
WHERE I NEED HELP
• A timeline. Will guests eat and immediately leave if there’s no dancing? I‘m hoping that if we schedule the scavenger hunt prizes and the piñata for an hour or so after brunch is served, there will be something keeping everyone here.
• Seating logistics. For the original wedding, I created a seating chart (which is suuuuper necessary for this group) that had 8 people per table—which, in this case, means 8 people per picnic blanket. How big should each blanket be to comfortably accommodate 8 guests? I’m also providing a pillow for each guest to sit on...anybody know where to get like 60 pillows for real cheap? My mom is sewing pillowcases to help everything match.
• Decorations. I’m keeping these to a minimum: a couple of signs with directions, props and a backdrop for the Selfie Spot, and centerpieces. I’m planning to buy small wooden boxes I can put in the middle of each picnic blanket to hold table numbers and centerpieces; any ideas on where to get boxes like that? Suggestions for decorations I haven’t thought of?
• Set-up logistics. Someone needs to go set everything up the morning of the event and babysit everything while the ceremony is going on—it’s a public park, and while we’re allowed to reserve it for the wedding, the park doesn’t provide security to keep people away from our stuff. Has anyone done this before? I can’t ask my MOH because whoever is in charge of this will have to miss the wedding itself.
Sorry this post got so long. I love love love this stage of the planning process and now that I’m over the initial disappointment of postponing, I’m excited to start it all over again. Let me know if you have ideas/critiques/suggestions—I’m super open to brainstorming, I love to DIY, and my Pinterest app is OPEN!
submitted by bridezilla5320 to Weddingsunder10k [link] [comments]

Budget Breakdown for Cancelled Bay Area, California, Wedding for 150 Guests

I wanted to share the budget breakdown for my Summer 2020 wedding for 150 guests in a high cost of living area (Bay Area, California). Before we started planning, we created a budget based on lots of articles and online resources/calculators. But we were really surprised to see Bay Area quotes far exceed anything we calculated and had to re-up our budget to be more realistic a couple times.
We had to cancel our wedding due to COVID-19 and instead got married in a wonderful virtual wedding. But since the wedding was (nearly) fully planned, I thought I'd share to help out others struggling to understand pricing.
Some notes:
Category Amount (rounded to closest $100)
Venue $19,000 + $3,000 refundable security deposit
Catering $24,300
Beverages $2,300
Photography $5,500
DJ $1,600
Florals $1,600
Shuttles $3,600
Insurance $300
Clothing $4,500
Rings $3,300
Hair & Makeup $1,900
Officiant $600
Legal $100
Invitations $0
Total $68,600 + $3,000 refundable security deposit

Venue ($19,000 + $3,000 refundable security deposit)

We fell in love with our venue from the moment we stepped onto it. However, we took some time to decide and toured several other venues because the original rental price was $22,000 for a Sunday. We asked for and were thrilled to receive a discount of $3,000 because our requested date was ~6 months away by the time we signed.
The venue included a LOT of things and we felt that we/our guests would be really well taken care of, so that justified the price for us.

Catering ($24,300)

I reached out to 11 different caterers and was surprised that they were all quoting in the $22-30k range for 150 guests. And this didn't include the cost of alcohol. This was far more than I had been anticipating (or had read about in online budgeting articles).
The caterer we ended up going with originally gave us a quote of $27-30k (based on which options were chosen). I had sent them (and some other caterers) honest emails thanking them for the quote but noting they were out of our budget. Some caterers would give suggestions on which options to remove to save money, but this caterer really impressed us by graciously extending us their 2019 pricing and offering a free tasting dinner (that we'd only have to pay tip for).
The final contract included the following:

Beverages ($2,300)

We went with a beverage company to provide enough liquor for 150 guests. They would drop-off more than enough for all the guests before the wedding and pick-up any unused alcohol the next day.

Photography ($5,500)

Other than making our guests happy, this was the other item we cared a lot about. This was the range of quotes we received (all similar packages):
Our photographer's package originally offered a physical album, but we asked to swap the album with one more hour of wedding day photography. They were really kind to accommodate this request.
The final contract included the following:
We had our engagement session with them before COVID-19, and they were amazing. We were super happy with the pictures and used them for our website, invitations, and emails.

DJ ($1,600)

We looked through websites/reviews of 7 recommended DJs and had calls with 2 of them. They both gave the same price, but the DJ we ended up going with had a slight edge in offerings. (Things not offered by other DJ marked with asterisk.)

Florals ($1,600)

We wanted to save on florals because (a) the venue was already beautiful and (b) florals don't directly impact guest experience.
I researched/contacted 12 different florists and was surprised to learn that many Bay Area florists have (in my POV) extremely high minimum spend requirements (e.g. $4000, $6000, and $7000). Only 3 florists were somewhat close to our budget of $1600.
The florist we went with had really beautiful work and was very respectful of our budget and understood our hopes to use lots of greenery, in-season/inexpensive flowers, small bouquets, etc.
The final contract included the following:

Shuttles ($3,600)

Our venue had limited parking, we were concerned about guests driving after drinking, and the venue wasn't in the best location for UbeLyft pick-ups. So we had to get some shuttles for guests. Of the guests who had RSVPed to our wedding before it was cancelled, a quite large proportion of them were planning to take the shuttle, so I'd say it was a pretty necessary expense.
We only had three options for shuttle companies, and there was a clear price difference between the one we chose and the other two. We arranged for four minibuses to do pick-up of guests before the wedding and drop-off after the wedding. The bus rides would have been ~30 minutes from the stops to the venue (one-way).

Insurance ($300)

The venue required liability insurance for guests and the venue. We got insurance before COVID and were so amazed/lucky/surprised to realize it included some cancellation/postponement coverage. We still lost a lot of money by cancelling, but the insurance definitely made it more palatable.

Clothing ($4,500)

I personally didn't want to spend too much on my dress because I'd only wear it once. But we figured that my husband would be able to wear a nice suit many times in the future, so we really splurged on that. (At the time, we were invited to 5 weddings just months after our own; obviously none of those weddings are happening in their original forms anymore.)
Sub-breakdown of this category:
* After lots of indecision about bridesmaid dresses and the bridesmaids not being on the same page about a dress, Birdy Grey was an amazing stress-reliever. I just picked a color, and they all got to pick the different styles they wanted. I just bought them all gift cards that they could use to cover the cost of their dresses.
** Getting to pick all the fabric, buttons, thread colors, style, etc. for the suit was one of the most fun things my husband and I did for wedding planning. So much more fun for me than dress shopping. :D

Rings ($3,300)

My husband and I chose my engagement ring together ($2200). I wanted a diamond alternative, researched/got excited about moissanite, and found an awesome local jeweler (Or Diamond).
We liked my ring so much that we went with the same jeweler for both our wedding bands ($1100 combined).

Hair & Makeup ($1,900)

This expense was honestly the toughest to swallow. I wanted to gift hair & makeup to my mother, mother-in-law, and 3 bridesmaids. We're all Asian or half-Asian, so a major criteria was having some examples of work on Asian ladies with subtle, clean makeup looks.
I contacted 14 hair & makeup artists (HMUAs) and got the following ranges of quotes (from the ones that got back to me):
I hadn't decided on an artist by the time I canceled the wedding, and I was almost glad/relieved that it was canceled so that I could stop stressing about this. If I had continued, I'd most likely have bitten the bullet and gone with one of the $1900 quotes.

Officiant ($600)

We asked our pastor for pre-marital counseling sessions and to officiate our wedding. The sessions were really valuable, and he did an excellent job officiating our online wedding.

Legal ($100)

This covered a marriage license and a couple marriage certificates. (We ended up spending a bit more on this than budgeted because we also needed an online ceremony.)

Invitations ($0)

We did zero paper for this wedding because we figured it was a good way to save money (and nice for reducing waste as well). (We have absolutely no problem with people that do create beautiful paper invitations -- we just didn't want to deal with the hassle of DIYing, addressing envelopes, etc.)
For the Save The Date, we used a pretty template from GreetingsIsland (and paid $7 for the image). For the invitation, my husband created a graphic using one of our favorite engagement photos. We sent both Save The Date + invitation through email with links to our wedding website.
submitted by PotentialDelivery940 to weddingplanning [link] [comments]

[RECAP] SoCal | 250 Guests | $33k | Feb 08, 2020

Hello! I hope other brides find this helpful!
But first... PICTURES!
Location: San Gabriel, Pasadena & Westminister, CA
Guests: 250
Budgeted: $35,000
Spent: $32,959
Our wedding was a Chinese/Vietnamese-American Catholic wedding. My husband and I paid for the wedding out of our own pockets. It took us about 2 years to plan and save for the wedding. There were a lot of DIYs to cut costs and help from family and friends setting everything up.
Now onto the details!
Florals: $294
Ceremony (Catholic Church): $700
Tea Ceremony: $479
Reception: $18,253
Photography + Videography: $9,161
Attire: $2,228
Makeup + Hair: $1,235
Misc: $609
​
Thank you if you've made it this far! Feel free to ask questions, if any :)
submitted by tinaul to weddingplanning [link] [comments]

Wedding anniversary coming up in a few months, I have no happy memories.

My husband [24] and I [22F] are a fairly young couple and were engaged very young (20 & 19, respectively). We’ve known each other since I was 16 and he, 18. With that out of the way:
We had a really sweet and lovely laidback romance. DH is happy to go along with me, and I’m usually the one dragging him all over. There was a ton of chemistry from the very first time we met. After we started dating a few years after meeting, we were engaged within 2 months. We did not want a large wedding — we joked from the get-go that we would get married in ratty sweats by an Elvis impersonator, then go for pizza with friends after. Once we actually set a date and started considering what we wanted, both of us came to the decision that we would get married on Halloween and have pizza with friends, then go to a haunted house afterwards. We just wanted to have fun, a big wedding sounded stressful and expensive and wasn’t the scene for either of us.
Cue MIL: We kept our engagement a secret for a few months — I was still in college and we were long distance. The very first time she met me, she humiliated me in front of his entire extended family. The visit he’d made to see me before had been when we were engaged and, naturally, there was celebratory sex. A couple of marks were left on his neck below his shirt collar. You couldn’t see them unless you went looking and pulled his shirt aside, no big deal. MIL, within ten minutes of meeting me, shouts in front of his whole family that she “did not like those marks on her son’s neck, and she better never see them there again”. DH and I were flabbergasted and thoroughly embarrassed.
She would not stop asking about the ring I wore on my ring finger. It was tiny and delicate and did not look like a wedding ring at all, and I told her I couldn’t remember where I’d gotten it because the engagement was still mum. She kept hounding us, asking if it meant anything. It was stressful.
Moving on, once we revealed the engagement she acted like it was hers. She posed me for engagement announcement pictures, then insisted on taking engagement photos. She told me to dress warmly for the pictures... Then, surprise, we were having them done in a tropical garden. I looked completely out of place with an ivory winter dress, scarf, and boots. The pictures are horribly embarrassing. She insulted my engagement ring, then tried to pawn off one of her old engagement rings (Tiffany diamonds) saying that DH would never be able to afford a rock like that. I did not accept it — I never cared about his money and I didn’t want to take anything, much less a ring worth a fortune, from her, especially after she insinuated that I’d be concerned with something so materialistic as what ring he proposed or married me with.
Once she heard our wedding plans, she lost her everloving mind. It was a constant barrage of her insisting on a “real” wedding, and we lost count of how many times she tried taking the reigns. Eventually, I got tired of telling her no and dealing with the aftermath from her tantrums and gave in. DH, like with most things, went along with me because he thought it was what I wanted. MIL told us not to worry, she would pay for everything, which is the ONLY reason why I finally caved and said whatever.
She ignored everything I wanted. She insulted my dress that I had bought myself months before. She would not shut up about how DH and I needed to lose weight (I was only 120 pounds...).
Eventually we were just a couple of days out from the wedding, I was incredibly depressed because I had (stupidly) been hoping to bond with MIL because I had no relationship with my own mother. That obviously didn’t happen. It was time to meet the officiant and lay out the ceremony and vows. We met her and found out that, surprise surprise, MIL had tried insisting that she wanted to be there, too. Officiant told us that she usually saves this for just the bride and groom and had told her no. I blurted, “Oh, thank goodness, I appreciate that.” Officiant looks concerned and asks what the process has been like so far — she’s a pastor and tells us that this conversation is confidential, so we tell her everything. She sympathized. We ask for a non-religious ceremony because we’re both agnostics and I have significant religious trauma. She agrees and says it will be no trouble.
We get home from the meeting and MIL is on the phone with someone, but we think nothing of it. DH is called over to her. MIL goes absolutely off the hinges and starts screaming at him about how she didn’t raise him to be this way, he needs to stick to his roots, he needs to stand up to me, why doesn’t he want god in his wedding, is this my choice, etc. Apparently the pastor was friends with MIL and divulged our entire conversation and meeting with MIL RIGHT AFTER we left. AFTER telling us it was confidential. With my religious trauma, I felt violated yet again. DH told her that it’s our wedding, this was our choice, and we thought that would be the end of it.
The night before the wedding, I was up until 2am making floral centerpieces because MIL thought I didn’t need a florist, I could DIY. I was so tired and I hated them. She picked up flowers for my bouquet — they were half dead and horribly wilted, so I had to wake up at 7am on the day of my wedding to get flowers from the local grocery store to make my own bouquet under a time crunch. MIL says it looks awful. Big whoop, thanks. I’m late to my own wedding because hair and makeup were running late. My hair stylist was wonderful and so sweet, I broke down crying and told her everything. She gave me a huge hug and told me to call her later if I needed margaritas and a gal pal. 12/10. The MUA on the other hand... She ignored me when I told her I have a lot of makeup allergies and can only use a couple of specific brands. She used makeup that I am allergic to. My face was ungodly itchy through my entire wedding day and I had a terrible rash once I finally got to take it all off. MIL yelled at me when I took it off because makeup was $100. She didn’t care that I was starting to have difficulty breathing and felt feverish.
I finally get to the venue, the music starts, I’m trying really hard not to sneak a shot of tequila from the bar before I walk in. I get in there and I freeze in terror. The hall is decorated so tacky and trashy, it was hideous. MIL is in a black cocktail dress at my summer wedding... I know almost no one in the room, it’s all MIL’s family and friends. My family has one table, and it includes my only 2 friends. Apparently MIL couldn’t fit anymore people in, except for those she wanted there. DH’s dad’s (FIL) side (who have always been so kind and sweet to me) were left standing in the back of the venue. I finally remember to smile and walk. I get to the altar. Then the officiant begins reading off a ceremony that was ten times more religious and Christian than the sample ceremony script she told us was her usual go-to. My heart sank and I felt panicky the entire ceremony because, yay, religious trauma. MIL was staring at us with a snarky smile and watching my face the whole time. I stared back and probably had the most unbecoming look on my face, but I didn’t care. DH was begging me with his eyes not to cause a scene because our venue was in a hall inside of a local fine restaurant, and if I had stormed out random people would’ve seen. I tried so hard not to cry, but I did — everyone thought it was happy tears, but I was so hurt and angry. For the rest of the reception, I couldn’t even sit down because everyone kept yelling at me about “when is cake?”
THEN, one of MIL’s family, who I don’t even know, asks me when the baby is due. I was not pregnant. I did not look pregnant. Apparently there was some sort of rumor circulating that DH and I were only getting married because I was pregnant and that’s why the wedding was such short notice... I’d had a miscarriage (accidental and by DH) the year before. Nobody outside of DH and I knew, he hasn’t told anyone, and I’m still sad about it even now. So, that comment was insulting and very distasteful, as well as deeply hurtful, and MIL turned out to be the source of it. Shocker.
DH’s dad’s (FIL) side wasn’t even allowed in the hall after the ceremony. They had to sit at a regular table in the main dining area in exile. DH’s only living grandmother did me proud though and was super petty, remarking to MIL, “Oh, MIL, I was so shocked that you invited me, I never thought my name would grace your thoughts ever again. It’s just wonderful to see my grandson and his beautiful bride be married. Isn’t she gorgeous?” MIL looked like she’d sucked on a lemon.
The only halfway decent memory I have isn’t even my wedding. DH’s dad threw us a small reception dinner at a local diner with their side of the family. They were so kind and understanding, his tías and cousins hugged me and said they were sorry it didn’t go well. His stepmom hugged me and kissed my head and told me she was there if I needed to talk.
Oh, and after? We were left with almost $1,500 of debt. We didn’t even want the bullshit anyway.
I’m so angry and hurt over it still even though we’re coming up on our third anniversary. I hate myself for letting her bully me. I hate her for not listening when DH tried to step in and set hard boundaries with her. I hate her for making me feel ugly on my wedding day. I hate her for making me feel stupid. I hate myself for being so naïve to think even for a moment that she would’ve been nice and motherly during a particularly vulnerable time in my life. I hate myself for letting her ruin a day that should’ve been spent briefly at the courthouse, then on to a barbecue and pizza with friends. I’m so angry at her, but I’m angry at myself for not having enough spine to just put my foot down and telling her to piss off. I know this kind of turned into a rant, I’m just hurting over it a lot right now and I’m going to therapy. My appointment yesterday unearthed a lot of feelings that I’d tried pushing down, so I needed a space where I knew others would understand. Thanks for listening.
submitted by comfymomjeans to JUSTNOMIL [link] [comments]

Long Recap of Tiny Wedding | June 05, 2020 | MA/NH | 10 guests | $5K

Long Recap of Tiny Wedding | June 05, 2020 | MA/NH | 10 guests | $5K
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https://preview.redd.it/0y3qhf6kqa951.jpg?width=3087&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0d3de9eb758fbd1f410b0a954d69271cdeb801f6
This is super long but I found recaps so helpful when planning (and re-planning) so here is the recap of our tiny wedding during the COVID-19 pandemic!
Pictures first
Location: Lincoln, MA (ceremony in public park) and NH (reception at my parents’ house)
Date: June 05, 2020
Guests: 10 (immediate family and 2 close friends)
Total Cost: around $4700 (about $2200 on items we had not planned to spend on for our original wedding)
Original Plan: My husband(!) and I got engaged in May 2019 on our 5th anniversary and started planning right away, trying to split the planning evenly as much as possible. Our original wedding was planned for June 05, 2020 at Tower Hill Botanic Garden. That wedding has a guest list of ~130 and a budget around $50,000 and has been postponed to June 04, 2021 where we’ll celebrate Wedding Part II with a vow renewal and big reception. We decided to postpone in early April because we had many guests who would be traveling via plane / 65+ and we weren’t feeling comfortable with that aspect. All of our vendors postponed easily, for which we are very grateful! We knew we still wanted to be married on our original date and we are very lucky that the majority of our immediate family lives nearby so they could be there.
Ceremony Venue: Pierce Park (Free): For the ceremony, we wanted somewhere we could have a (mostly) private, quiet ceremony surrounded by beautiful trees / gardens for photos. After looking at lots of parks and gardens, we landed on Pierce Park in Lincoln, MA, which is a public park and the grounds of a historic home. We contacted Pierce House a few weeks in advance and they let us have our short ceremony in the park for free and were so kind and helpful!
Reception Venue: My parents’ house (Free): We had our semi socially distanced reception on my parents’ large back deck, about a 40 min drive from the ceremony location.
Photographer: Solare Wedding Photography ($500): I can’t say enough wonderful things about Cory from Solare!! She was so amazing and easy to work with. She photographed the ceremony, followed by about an hour and a half of family photos and portraits of us around the ceremony location. She very kindly offered to wrap the cost of this into our package for next year though we did give her some payment for the day because she is amazing and went well out of her way to help us out! Our friend who is great with a camera kindly captured some additional photos of the reception for us.
Attire: (~$320): My dress was a Dress the Population dress bought on eBay for $140. I bought (and returned) about a dozen dresses and had a Zoom fashion show with my bridesmaids which was really fun! Alterations (getting the bust and shoulders taken in) were about $60. The belt was a gift from my mom from Etsy ($35). Shoes were from Target ($20, purchased the day before the wedding) with shoe clips from White House Black Market that I already owned. The purse was “something borrowed” from my Mom. Jewelry was all pieces I already owned.
My husband’s suit was one he already owned from Regan Clothiers - we have a family connection so he luckily already owned two custom suits. His tie and pocket square were from Tie Bar ($50) and cufflinks with our monogram from Etsy ($12). We both have different outfits for next year; we decided to have a more casual look at the “tiny” wedding and save our formal outfits for the big celebration (in part because my dress was still with the tailor and wouldn't be ready in time).
Hair and Makeup: (~$180): I did my own hair and makeup with some help from my mom to place my hairpiece and veil. My hairpiece was from Dareth Colburn ($47 on sale) and veil was from Amazon ($35). Makeup was mostly stuff I already owned, though I did panic buy a bunch of makeup from Ulta last minute (~$100). VIP items were the setting spray and the lipstick which lasted all day. I wore stick-on nails from CVS and painted my toenails myself the night before since salons were still not open.
Officiant: Michael Backer ($575): We found our officiant based on recommendations from our original DJ/venue. He was a great mix of serious and funny and he was very flexible. He helped us write a beautiful personalized ceremony and we will be using him again next year for our vow renewal.
Music: (Free): The only music at the ceremony was our first dance immediately following the ceremony (we met ballroom dancing so couldn’t leave out the first dance) - we played the song off my phone plugged in to a portable speaker. We used a free trial of Pandora Premium (no ads) to play “French Cooking Radio” as the background music at the reception on a bluetooth speaker.
Video: (Free): We set up two tripods, one with our DSLR camera and the other with my husband’s iPhone. The iPhone worked incredibly well! The DSLR cut out after 15 minutes. We did not want to deal with the hassle of live-streaming from the park (which had poor cell reception), but we’re glad we were able to share the full ceremony with a few family members who weren't able to travel to be with us.
Food: Cucina Toscana (dinner - $270) and Cafe Madeleine (dessert - $205): We got takeout meals from a favorite Italian restaurant in Nashua and each guest chose their meal. My parents’ good friend offered to pick up the order, plate the meals, and bring them out to the deck for us. For “cocktail hour” we had some charcuterie and cheese. Dessert was from our favorite Boston café - an incredible chocolate cake and an assortment of macarons. I have always stated firmly that my wedding cake would be chocolate cake and I have no regrets!
Bar: (~$350): We purchased our alcohol at the NH liquor outlet and Wegman’s about a week in advance. Because it was such a small group, we splurged on nice champagne, and also had a few bottles of wine and some assorted craft beer.
Flowers: Anne’s Florals & Gifts (~$200): My mom handled ordering the flowers and worked with a local florist based on a few Pinterest photos I sent her. We got a bouquet for me, a boutonniere for my husband, and two centerpieces for the reception tables. They came out exactly how I wanted: colorful, spilling, textural bouquets.
Wedding Rings: ($1700): We got both of our wedding bands from Scontsas, a local jeweler my family has used before, who found exactly what we were looking for when we went in to “just look” last winter. Not included in the cost: my engagement ring is a custom design with moissanite center stone from Cynthia Britt and my husband’s engagement ring is from Wedgewood Rings.
Decor: (~$400?): Decor was a mix of pieces we had already bought for the big wedding and several curbside pickup trips to Michaels. We had a monogram made for us shortly after we got engaged (artist here), so we borrowed my mom’s Cricut to put the monogram on a few things. It’s hard to pin down the decor costs since we were pulling things together last minute with my family but I estimate everything altogether (tablecloths, twinkle lights, tealights, tulle, plastic plates, and various signs / frames / bits of decor) was around $350 - $400. Luckily, my family was able to borrow a few extra folding tables and had plenty of chairs for us to use. We took the two days off before the wedding to go up to my parents house and arrange the deck, hang up twinkle lights, etc.
Honeymoon: (not included in the costs; we didn't really track honeymoon costs): Since we weren’t able to travel (especially not to Italy, our original honeymoon), we decided to take a week off of work and do an around-the-world staycation. Each day we picked a theme and based the day around that. So on Spanish day we ordered tapas, made sangria, and visited a sculpture park; on Bali day we ordered açai bowls, had a home spa day, made mai tais, and ordered Asian fusion; on Italy day we visited a winery, ate a charcuterie board, got cannolis delivered, etc. It wound up being super fun and the themed activities made it feel like a honeymoon so we didn't spend the whole week doing apartment projects or scrolling on our phones.
What Went Well:
  • Honestly, the tiny wedding went just about as well as we could have hoped. All of our vendors were incredible and our families were super patient and flexible. It was a lovely day shared with several of our closest people. We both felt very loved and really enjoyed the intimate ceremony. We very much enjoyed the DIY details despite the stress of trying to plan a wedding while guidelines shifted nearly daily.
  • We highly recommend visiting your ceremony location beforehand at the same time of day so you can get a feeling for lighting, best angles for video, etc.
  • It was so nice to have a relaxing day off before the wedding to wrap up little details and to be able to relax together the morning of the wedding. I didn’t start getting ready until around noon so we had the whole morning to just enjoy the excitement together at home.
What Could Have Been Improved:
  • My hair went flat pretty quickly. I’m not sure what we could have done to fix that since it was 85 degrees and very humid but this was a minor detail that I stressed about during photos.
  • We packed a “go bag” with a bunch of stuff in it but didn’t separate it out into categories which made things hard to find. We should have had 1 bag with cameras/ceremony electronics, 1 bag with hair and makeup touch-up, 1 bag with photo props, etc. I bought a parasol to take a few photos with and totally forgot it in the car.
  • We did not rehearse the ceremony and because of timing, we were the last to arrive at the ceremony location. Without a processional, we just went from setting up cameras straight into the ceremony. This did present a few minor awkward moments - me handing my bouquet off to my sister randomly during the ceremony, etc. and we did sort of miss the pomp and circumstance so lucky for us… we will get our full processional next year ;) We also forgot to introduce the few family members who hadn’t met before which was no big deal but would have been nice.
COVID Notes:
  • We tried to fairly strictly isolate ourselves in the weeks leading up to the wedding and our families did as well (some people had to go in to work, etc. but everyone made a conscious effort to stay home as much as possible).
  • We asked everyone to bring masks and their own chairs to the ceremony. Most everyone opted to stand and no one wore their masks, though family units did stand apart during the ceremony and we were outside the whole time.
  • No one was going to stop our family from hugging us a few times throughout the day but we tried to minimize contact outside of a few quick family photos. I’m sure we could have been stricter but everyone felt comfortable with the level of precaution. I think it helped massively that everything was outdoors and it was a small group of people.
  • One of the most stressful parts of planning was trying to get the license while most town halls were closed. In the end, we drove 2 hours to Western MA where my grandmother knew the town clerk in her small town who agreed to do the paperwork in the parking lot with masks. We were calling in all the favors to pull off the tiny wedding!
It wasn’t what we initially planned and it certainly wasn’t a perfect day but overall, we are really glad to be married. We didn’t want to put our marriage on hold and we’re really pleased with how our “minimony” turned out. Now we’re enjoying a break from planning for the “big wedding” next year :)
I know this was long winded but I hope this is helpful to anyone trying to pivot their plans! I’m happy to answer any questions!
submitted by snuggleloaf to weddingplanning [link] [comments]

Winter Wedding Rundown- Alexandria, Va

Savings- $10,000 J opened a 1 year CD (certificate of deposit). I did 1 year and a 6 month CD with our credit union/bank. All three CDs had interest rates between 1.5-3.5%and we each contributed an average of $175/paycheck for a little over a year. We purchased a lot of items on our credit card for points, then paid the debt off once the CD’s matured. Paying in cash saved us money when vendors had a cash discount. We paid cash for centerpieces, wedding dress, alterations, cake and photographer.
Guest list We invited 60 people and 50 people RSVP’d-45 adults, 3 children, and 2 infants. When we strayed from our small wedding vision we always turned back to one focal point: the purpose of a wedding for strangers to become family. There would be absolutely no guilt invites- we all have that embarrassing uncle and no, he does NOT need an invite.
Invites, RVSPs & Thank you cards – $60 I automatically yeeted the concept of an invitation suite as soon as I realized how wasteful it seemed. We sent the wedding invites out with our Christmas cards in late November for our late January wedding; the timing was perfect. The Wilton print-at-home invites were gifted from a friend who had an extra pack leftover from her wedding. If I needed more than 40 invites I wouldn’t have been able to use this gift. I customized the classic white invites by adding an inlay of lilac and pale yellow for a pop of color. I didn’t need to do save the dates since my engagement was only 5 months.
Office depot printed seating chart poster ($15)50 postcard—style RSVPS ($30)regular and postcard stamps ($15)
Venue-$4,650.00 Union Street Public House, Old Town Alexandria, VA Cost includes food, cake cutting fee, 3 hour premium open bar, linens, décor setup, audio equipment, personal waitress, 12% tax, and 20% tip.
One day we were out for lunch and he turned to me and said, “This is the place!” We had the ceremony, cocktail hour and reception at Union Street Public House, a historic waterfront restaurant in Alexandria, Va.
We rented the venue from 11-4:30 including setup and cleanup. The ceremony was sweet and simple. A 45 min cocktail ‘hour’ immediately followed (2 passed apps and open bar). We even had our own waiter for the sweetheart table. She was amazing and came to us with a plate of apps and drinks while we mixed and mingled. The passed apps were great! The crab cake sliders were larger than expected and the caprese skewers were flavorful. After taking pics with family and chowing down on crab cake sliders, we sat down for brunch. It started off with a choice of soup/salad and our meal options were shrimp & grits, gumbo, Belgian waffles, omelets and impossible burger kebobs. We did speeches, a hot cocoa toast and cake cutting to wrap up the day. We exited the restaurant to ‘We are Family’ then headed over to the hotel to change for the after party at a local game room-style bar.
Officiant- $190 I found Susan in my county’s clerk’s office directory. There was a $50 State fee for the ceremony, $30 license, and $40 for travel/parking. The readings were perfect in every way and she helped calm our nerves!
Hotel rooms- $1,325 The Alexandrian We splurged in the most unexpected place. We understood the financial difficulties of our bridal party (pregnant 2nd time mother, broke students, poor parents, etc.) and took on costs or chose affordable alternates to make things easier for everyone involved. We reserved a 2 night stay at the 600+sqft Eleonore Suite for $1,000 including parking. We also covered 2 rooms and parking for bridesmaids at $325 to make getting ready at 8am easier.
Dress/veil/jewelry- $1,400 I covered the cost of 1 bridesmaid dress ($60 from lulus.com). The necklace and watch were gifted by a groomsman. I wore his mom’s broche on my $30 ‘fur’ shawl from Amazon.
· Wedding dress, headband, and veil from a local shop - $1,300+. · After party dress from JCPenneys-$12 · ‘rose gold’ gauges from Hot Topic- $18. · 2 pair of shoes for the day for $85. One sophisticated pair to match my dress and a pair to show my fun personality for the after party.
Alterations- $500 My dress had 3 layers of scalloped lace, satin, tulle and a train! I knew alterations would be costly but didn’t expect it to be that high. I needed a 2.5 inch hem, a bustle and for the side to be taken in .25 inches. I saved $100 by paying in cash
Tux and shoes- $1,495 My husband rented the tuxes online for himself and 4 groomsmen for $1200. My dad didn’t have a nice fitting tux so we bought him one from JCPenneys for $210 with a 15% coupon.
Decorations- $365 & Flowers- $30 I opted for a pretty venue so that I didn’t need to go heavy on DIY décor or stress over coordinating the setup/breakdown/transportation of decorations. I found the sola wood centerpieces on weddingswap for $250 for 8 centerpieces and 3 signs (no phones, gifts, & cake). It’s a valuable resource for buying and selling wedding items
A Ring Security backpack and sunglasses for the 2yr old ring bearer with decoy ring box was $25. I went a bit crazy at the Hobby Lobby 50% off wedding and floral sale. I spent $105 for 2 lavender bouquets, 1 accent flower, 8 lavender boutonnieres, card box, guest book, lace and bell wands for the flower girl, cake cutting set, gold paint
I went to Wegmans (grocery store) to buy glittered baby breath for $12. The MOH gifted me burlap lace ribbon to wrap the bouquets in, a photo wall with white curtains and 3 flower wreaths from my mom’s wedding as a backdrop. I borrowed a coworkers hot glue gun to complete projects.
Hair and nails - $35 Since photos started at 10:30am, having our hair done professionally didn’t really fit with the schedule. We all did a hainails trial run during our bachelorettes party- loose curls then a low side bun as a backup. I did a simple curly up do with lots of hairspray. Everyone brought their hair tools and makeup pallets so we could take turns helping each other with hair and makeup. With 8 women in one room, one of us HAD to of known what to do. It worked out wonderfully and was so fun!
The bridesmaids and I all coordinated our nails. We used short nails Kiss Brand nails for $8 from Walgreens. The medium nails popped off of my bridesmaids on our test run, so stick with short nails. We each bought new mascara, eyeliner and lip tint for around $25.
**Cakes- $25 ($85 gifted)** Harris Teeter ($65/sheet) - they’re all moist and not overly sweet. The Harris Teeter cake for the guests was marble with whipped cream topping. As for our cake, we chose a decadent 8-inch triple layer chocolate with cocoa shavings and buttercream frosting for $20. The gold painted cake topper said Married AF (Always and Forever for the Boomers) was bought from Esty for $25. My sister-in-law picked up the cakes that morning and also was gracious enough to cover that cost.
Birdseed Ornament Favors- $5 The heart cookie cutters were $5 at Michaels. The MOH and MOB bought the birdseed, suet, 'Thank you' tags, twine, and cellophane bags. We did an assembly line to make 50 ornaments that day.
Music- free on Pandora Plus I did most of the wedding planning, but my husband really ran with the baton on this one. He signed up for a Pandora Plus free trial 3 weeks before the wedding. The free trial lasts a month and we cancelled the before the month was over. He made 3 custom playlists for the day. We had our outgoing best man control the music and moderated the speeches. The A/V equipment was provided by the venue.
Photography- $1900 The photographer started photos at 10:30am and our last shots at were around sunset at 5:30. The price included travel, tip, a custom coffee table album, a online album, a USB drive, and 1 large stretch canvas of our favorite image. The venue was walking distance from Captain’s row, an iconic cobblestone street, and Wales Alley, a brick street with ivy laced historic buildings. Having the water right behind us and huge stable doors really set the mood for the photoshoots.
Ring for Husband- $390 My ring price in unknown and not included in the total. It’s a rose gold Charles & Colvard Moissanite engagement and wedding ring set with channel stones. I bought my husband a thick rose gold band to match my rings. JCPennys had a coupon that could be used on jewelry.
Bridal Party gift baskets- $150 I did a mix of beauty/health items, Black History flash cards(very timely), and leggings for the four bridesmaids. The flower girl had a butterfly shaped basket with Frozen branded stuff and a unicorn headband.
Website- Free I used the Knot for their website and included all of our RSVP’s, registry, pre-engagement pics, the party info along with travel and lodging.
After party- Free Since we got married on a Monday night of a MLK Day, we didn’t have to reserve space at a hip hangout spot in the city. We did karaoke and bowling for about 3 hours between heavy drinks and light apps. The after party attendees paid for our food/drinks/games.
Total $12,600 We paid for the wedding using $10,000 saved and used almost $3,000 of savings that was earmarked for our house (We closed and moved in March!). We splurged on tuxes and the hotel.
Things we didn’t do: - We chose not to do engagement photos since we already have cute photos together. - We got married during off season on a Monday. It worked out to be a holiday that wasn’t busy in the day time so the venue cost was more affordable. Looking forward to having more anniversaries off work/on a holiday!! - We opted not to do the awkward dances. - We did not have a videographer, DJ, Day of Coordinator, or florist. - We came to the restaurant to rehearse the night before, but didn’t do a formal dinner.
submitted by tnew12 to Weddingsunder10k [link] [comments]

My (cancelled) 6/6/2020 wedding Budget recap: $45K, DIY venue, 220 guests, Downtown Los Angeles wedding

We made the official moves to cancel our wedding this week - notifying wedding party, then guests, then vendors. We don't plan to have the same big party, and are instead hoping to get married as soon as City Hall opens back up for us to get a license, and doing a smaller Catholic ceremony/reception once this is all over. As a final farewell to the would-be wedding, I wanted to still post a budget recap as we had taken a lot of effort to budget for everything needed. Some of this stuff is obviously an estimation as it would have depended on our final numbers, but this was our general estimates based on 220 guests. Wish I could have written this with photos to share, but I still hope it offers some clarity for couples planning a big wedding in a HCOL area. I included comments on my negotiations as well as how cancellation worked with these vendors.
Financial Summary
Total Cost of the Wedding: ~$45K
Our financial contribution: $40K
My mom's financial contribution: $5K wedding gift, plus floral costs/labor and other expenses picked up here and there
*Additional spending not included in budget (rings, outfits, alterations): $5760
**Total value of discounts and negotiations: ~$4200
***Total value of wedding if you included discounts and additional spending: ~$54,960
Breakdown
Venue & Insurance - $6500
- Seventh/Place venue ($6500) Venue was going to be the Seventh/Place in DTLA. It's a renovated warehouse space that fit our large guest count, had a lovely outdoor patio, had a 16 hour rental period and included tables and chairs as part of the rental price. Pricing also came with uplights lining the walls,string lights across the ceiling, and 2 security guards. It was a really simple but romantic space, and felt very us. They also had a full open vendor policy (except for florals and valet) so we could really shop around and find solutions to fit our budget. Price was originally $7150, negotiated a $650 discount for paying upfront. They have a Force Majeure clause and I requested 100% of our payment back on Friday. Still waiting to hear back from them but this is one I intend to fight tooth and nail for.
Food and Beverage - $24,894.03
- Hungry Bear Catering (Would have been $18007.28, we paid a $7946 deposit) Food was my #1 priority and going to be the biggest expense. Most traditional caterers were priced pretty similarly with more 'meh' food, and if I was going to spend thousands on catering, I wanted it to be memorable. This price includes 3 passed apps (tofu baos, crab cakes, beef tataki) and a family style meal of bread/buttefurikake chex mix on the table, 1 salad course, 2 mains (filet mignon and miso salmon), and 2 sides (fish glazed brussel sprouts and miso carbonara). Anyone with dietary restrictions got their own meal, as did kids. They also provided cake cutting, 3 welcome drinks, and coffee/tea service in this price. Price does not include equipment which we had to rent separately. Their base price is usually $80/person before tax and service charges, but we were able to negotiate down to $66.50/person without removing any services. Per the contract we would have gotten 50% of the deposit back for cancellation, but we decided to have them keep the cost and are working with them to donate meals to a food bank instead
- MTB Event Rentals ($2300) Estimate for bring in glassware, serving ware for the tables, and a full kitchen setup. MTB had the most reasonable prices and were great to work with. We were able to cancel and get 100% of our deposit back.
- Linens/Table Runners (~$600) An amazing fellow Wedditor offered to make cheesecloth table runners for me at cost. It came out to around $320 for 20 17 ft. white cheesecloth runners (around $1/ft). I wanted a clean tablescape with white linens, white runner and greenery down the table. These added a soft ethereal look to the table while staying minimalistic. I was also going to buy linens and napkins online.
- Compostable Plates ($450) Estimate for compostable dinner plate, salad plate, dessert plate, and family style platters for the table.
- Smoking Gun Bartending ($676.75) Found these guys on Thumbtack and so glad I did! This was for 2 bartenders and 1 bar back ($20/hr per staff). Price also included ice for the whole night, 2 mobile bar setups and coffee service and equipment. Even though we only paid for coffee for 150 people, they were going to bring enough cups for 220 to use for coffee and tea.
- Cups/Mixers/Alcohol ($2300) We were going to do wine, beer, and limited liquor (whiskey, gin, vodka) with a couple signature cocktails and mixers for basic cocktails. Cups I priced out through Amazon and were a combination of plastic 12 oz cups for beer, small 9 oz cups for cocktails and water, plus 12 oz stemless wine glasses.
- Whole Foods Cake ($300) I did the traditional cake tasting and it was so fun to try cool, unique flavors, but after getting a $665 quote, we decided that desserts were low priority for us. We were planning to do 3 round cakes on a tiered cake stand, plus some extra half sheets to serve.
- Si Paletas cart ($400) I am MOST sad about this!! I was excited to use the money we saved on cake to have boozy popsicles served during cocktail hour from a paletas cart. I think it would have been a really fun addition to a summer wedding.
- Welcome Happy Hour ($500) We were going to host a welcome happy hour from 4-7 PM the Friday before the wedding. We provided some food and drinks to start things off, but made it clear on our website that additional drinks & food can be purchased with happy hour pricing.
Photography/Videography (9.5%) - $3800
- River Medlock Photography ($3000) Photography was our #2 priority and budgeted $3-4K for photography. However, with the tea ceremony in the morning, we needed 10 hours of photography and found the going rate for 10 hours was $4500-$6K. Luckily, I found Jana + Jamie of River Medlock Photography through A Practical Wedding and I loved their work. For SoCal weddings, they offer a flat $3k package for full day coverage (12 hours max). Still deciding what we want to do about this vendor. Ideally, I'd love for them to still photograph our future celebration, but if not, we will forfeit the $600 deposit.
- Last Light Pictures videography ($800) We found Last Light Pictures through a recommendation on Reddit and they offered a raw footage package for $600, plus guest interviews for $200. We didn't have to pay a deposit for LLP so we just cancelled our contract with them.
Stationary/Paper Goods (1.13%) - $452
- Paperless Post Save the Dates ($50) Did digital STDs but I accidentally picked a layout that cost coins. Didn't realize it until I was finished designing and inputting addresses, and was too lazy to go back and redesign a free one. The $50 was my lazy tax.
- Invitation Design ($99) Bought a custom watercolor logo for our wedding suite ($50). We incorporated the heart shaped rock by Land's End in SF (the location where we got engaged), a California poppy (husband's CA roots), a lotus (my Vietnamese heritage) and our cat. I also had her do a rendering of our wedding venue ($49). We used the logo on all our paper goods and designed on Canva.
- Invitations ( ~$195) We printed invites in Vietnam and got 180 envelopes with our return address on them, 2-sided invite cards, a 1-sided details card, and a 1-sided invite card for our Catholic ceremony (smaller, separate ceremony). I paid ~$60 for the deposit and then my mom ended up paying the rest when she picked it up. Cost is an estimate because of conversion rates. Price also includes 200 paper boxes which we put chocolates in and laid at each place setting for favors. It was unnecessary, but the boxes cost $6 total and my mom really wanted it, so we let her handle it.
- Postage ($0) I took stamps from work and expensed some more so we paid $0 for postage. Unethical? Maybe. But the company that just acquired us closed our SF office and require us to work from home 100% without reimbursing us for any internet or phone costs, so I consider this part of my benefits package.
- Website ($72) made the mistake of using Squarespace before trying any of the free websites. I just loved how much control you had over the website and could not go back, so we ended up just purchasing a year hosting and custom domain. My husband works for a university so we got the education discount.
- Signage ($120) Planned to print a welcome sign and seating chart on Vistaprint for about $20 each. My friend had given me a nice frame from her wedding, which we used for the welcome sign, and we were going to buy another poster frame for $10 for the seating chart. Michael's at easels for sale for $12 each.
- Other paper goods ($50) Was going to design the programs (bilingual wedding, programs were necessary), menu and bar signs on Canva. Staples sells cardstock for $50.
Entertainment (3.5%) - $1387.96
- Bouquet Sound DJ ($1095) By the time we got to picking a DJ, we were pretty decision fatigued. Bouquet Sound played at my friend's wedding and we enjoyed it, so I reached out to them.The owner offered us a referral rate, which we were able to negotiate down a little further. This was for ceremony, cocktail hour, and reception music. Original package was $1495, he offered us a referral rate of $1295, and I negotiated a little further by expressing that we wanted to go with them but my budget was $1k. He brought it down to $1095 if we were able to pay the deposit same day. We will forfeit the deposit but still need to contact them about it.
- Photobooth ($450) Was planning to DIY a photo station but ended up finding DJ Michael Han based on Reddit referrals. We booked his photobooth for 4 hours, 6 X 8 strips and digital gallery for $350. Super reasonable prices, especially compared to the $700+ rates I was getting from other vendors. Planned to spend another $100 to get life size cardboard cut outs of me, my husband, and our cat Ben Kenobi for props.Paid a $100 deposit which he gave back.
- Giant Jenga & various games ($40) Bought giant Jenga on Black Friday as a lawn game for some additional entertainment. So, I guess I now have Giant Jenga.
Day of Coordinator (4.5%) $1800
My coordinator was Tiffany at Modest Magnolia. She is very experienced with weddings and you could tell from the first conversation with her. Though she was only a DOC, I was in contact with her throughout my entire planning process and she reached out to me in January for my June wedding with a wedding planning worksheet so she can get started on working on my timeline.. Her going rate is $2k, but I was able to negotiate a $200 discount for offering to pay upfront. I'm trying to see if I can transfer my rate to someone who might be looking for a coordinator. Otherwise we'll forfeit the deposit.
Flowers &Decor (0.58%) $230 I'm solidly in the camp of "no one cares about decor" so we kept it very minimal. i think the brick walls and greenery of the venue were gorgeous on their own, so we let the place mostly speak for itself and just bought a few things to fill up the tables.
Flowers My mom was going to pay for and make all our flowers so luckily we didn't have to deal with a floral deposit!
Centerpieces ($0) My cousin got married in Vietnam and she had 12 wood lantern displays with fake flowers and candles in them lining her ceremony aisle. She offered them to me after the wedding and we were going to repurpose into centerpieces. My best friend is getting married in April so she's going to use these instead, so I'm glad they are still getting put to use!
Candles, vases, table numbers (~$230) Bought gold vases and mercury votives off my friend for $80, plus a ton more led candles and votives on FB marketplace. Also planned to buy wood block table numbers on Etsy to tie in with the wood centerpieces, so this is budgeted in here too.
Hair and Makeup - $1212
- Studio MM&B Includes hair and makeup for bride ($480) and trial ($250). I also paid for my mom's hair and makeup ($190) plus 50% of any services that my bridal party wanted (another $292). Studio MM&B was great, super professional and talented artists, but they definitely have the prices to reflect that. I paid for this deposit maybe 3 weeks before the world blew up, so really regretting this one. It's non-refundable though, so what can you do.
Wedding Party Gifts/Attire - $1200 In lieu of presents, we paid for our wedding party's attire. It was definitely more money than if we just bought them small presents, but 3 out of my 5 bridesmaids are in grad school/medical residencies and I knew that the most thoughtful present would be to help with the cost of being in the wedding. My bridesmaids wore midi length sage green dresses from Fame&Partners and City Chic, and their dresses ranged from $100-$139. For groomsmen, we were going to pay for the suit rental (jacket&pant) from Generation Tux at $139 each.
Transportation costs - $1592.50
\ - Riz Transportation shuttle service ($580) Price is for 5 hours, inclusive of tax and gratuity. I booked the shuttle to transport the groom's family + wedding party from LA to my parent's house for our tea ceremony (a 20-30 minute drive). We could have let people figure this out themselves, but I wanted to keep the group on time and keep people from needing to rent a car just to get to the tea ceremony.Just emailed him today about our deposit, so still waiting to hear back.
- Valet parking ($1012.50) The rate was $135/hr for 25 cars. The vendor requires that you book them for an hour before your event starts up to 30 minutes after the end time (7.5 hours). This was a painful expense, but parking in the Arts District can be hit or miss and I was already throwing my traditional Vietnamese family for a loop with my warehouse wedding. So we paid for parking, which was organized and invoiced by our venue. Luckily this was going to be handled through the venue so we didn't have to put any money down.
Tips - $1000 What I had budgeted for tips
Additional Spending Not included in Budget - $5760 Basically our attire and wedding rings, which we paid for through our regular paychecks and not the savings account. I didn't really consider these part of the wedding budget because they are going to last us past the wedding day, but wanted to include the breakdown for transparency.
- Groom's suit ($500) My husband got a custom 2-piece suit made in Vietnam at a tailor we've used before. He could definitely get a suit in Asia for far less but this shop stocks high quality fabrics and does all of their tailoring in-house so it's still a bargain for the price point.
- Wedding Dress ($2500) I bought the A La Robe Juliette in blush at The Dress Theory in Seattle. It's a simple slip dress and it was just a perfect fit for my style. The soft pink color and deep low back felt rebellious and fashion forward, but also it was minimal and comfy AF. I'm currently debating if I want to keep this or just resell it to get some money back from this wedding. I do still love it and it has rewearability potential though, so I'm back and forth.
- Wedding Headpiece ($690) I bought a Jennifer Behr headpiece off Poshmark impulsively. This was a ridiculous purchase but I loved it. Hoping to be able to resell or give to a friend to use for any upcoming weddings.
- Alterations ($410) This was the estimate for alterations. My dress is currently sitting with them and my first fitting was supposed to be end of April. Unsure now if they'll be open then, but I didn't have to put any money down so this was money not yet spent.
- Wedding Rings ($1660) My husband got a 6.5 mm gold comfort fit band for $820. I got two wedding bands off an online retailer,Noemie, for $840 total. My engagement ring was passed down from my MIL and we didn't make any changes to it, so it was $0.
Final Thoughts:
Overall, we probably stand to forfeit ~$10k in lost deposits, though we *could* have gotten more back from our caterer. I know this is a ton of money (as much as some people's whole weddings) and it was definitely not an easy decision to walk away from. However, the big wedding just no longer felt like something we wanted after going through this tough year (Covid on top of other personal stuff), and I'm big on not letting the "Cost Sunk Fallacy" drive your decisions. By walking away from $10k, we will have saved $30K. It actually worked out well because I'm now at risk for getting furloughed, so the extra savings is an extreme blessing during these shaky times!
And a final plug - if anyone is interested in any of these vendors, I may be able to discuss transferring my contract and payments to you. Would love for them to still fill their calendars and get some business!
submitted by NotAnAd2 to weddingplanning [link] [comments]

RECAP: Houston wedding, 120 guests, $52k budget (LONG)

Hey y’all! Like most other recappers, these were super helpful when planning my wedding and I’d like to pay it forward! This is going to be kind of long because, well, I don’t have any plans for the rest of the weekend…or the year…Feel free to ask me any questions or advice!
Engagement length: 14 months
Location: Houston, TX
General Date: Saturday evening in March
Guest Count: 160 invited (50% out of state), 130 RSVP’ed Yes, 120 Attended (no kids except 1 ring bearer)
Wedding Party: 8 bridesmaids, 8 groomsmen, 2 ushers, 1 ring bearer
Total Budget / Actual Spend: $52k / $53k
US AS AN (INTERRACIAL) COUPLE:
We both work for the same company and met about 4 years ago in North Dakota. We are an interracial couple (I’m Chinese American, he’s….well, Midwestern) and that came with its own challenges during the wedding planning - we wanted a mostly American wedding but also wanted to include some Chinese cultural touches! My parents are not that traditional, so we didn’t have a tea ceremony, but here are some of the Chinese elements we included:
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BUDGET BREAKDOWN
Venue ($8,500)
We picked a romantic, Italian-style event venue that’s pretty well-known in Houston. I had wanted to go more towards the rustic/farmhouse type wedding (more DIY opportunities!) but my husband wanted something different from the other weddings he’s been to. This price includes the ceremony, cocktail hour, and reception spaces; valet parking; tables, chairs and basic linens; security guard; tax and service fee.
Food and Drink ($15,500)
Our venue has an in-house chef for appetizers and dinner, so we only had to shop around for desserts.
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Florals and Decor ($3,850)
I was not very picky about any part of the florals because I trust the professionals and know nothing about flowers myself. They turned out great - we chose a few images we liked on Pinterest and our florist made it happen!
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Music ($3,500 including $400 stage rental)
We are big live music fans, so having a live band was important to us. However, I will say if you’re on a budget, this is one thing you really don’t need. Most of the weddings I’ve been to have had DJs and they were still a blast. But….THE BAND WAS AMAZING. They also did a jazz trio for the cocktail hour and set up the sound system/microphones for our ceremony at an additional cost.
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Photo/Video ($4,350 total / $2,000 photo / $2,000 video / $350 photo booth)
LOVED our photographer. We had used a friend for engagement photos, so they let me replace that part of the package with bridal portraits instead! Highly recommend doing portraits ahead of time if you’re on a tight schedule the day of the wedding; got a lot more pictures of my dress and the venue beforehand so I was less stressed the day of. I also timed my hair and makeup trial for the same day as the portraits.
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Gifts ($2,000)
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Stationery ($1,250)
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Attire ($6,000)
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Day-of Coordinator ($1,000)
Rehearsal Dinner ($5,000)
We had about 60 people attend because we invited the wedding party and their dates, plus a lot of out-of-town guests. We held it at a brewery, so we served BBQ for dinner and opened up the event to all other guests after dinner to enjoy beers outside!
After-party ($1,000)
Because our venue had such restrictive timing, we decided to move the party to a casual bar down the street. We covered the tab here as well.
Tips ($600 total)
This doesn't include the required gratuity for both the wedding and rehearsal dinner venues. I gave my MOH's boyfriend a bunch of envelopes with each vendor's name so he could hand them out during the wedding. Delegate!
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WHAT WENT WELL
WHAT DIDN’T GO WELL / SHOULD HAVE DONE DIFFERENTLY
WHAT I DIDN’T NEED, IN HINDSIGHT
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Budget/Breakdown: $23k Phoenix AZ wedding, February 15 2020, 135 guests, LGBT

We were engaged March 2019, so we had an 11 month engagement. Our wedding was on our 4 year anniversary!
Budget
I set a budget of $20k, but my fiancee wife upped the budget to $25k, to my surprise, given I was the one more excited about wedding planning!
We paid for 95% of the wedding ourselves. My wife’s parents paid for the DJ, and my mom paid for my dress alterations.
Guest List
Invited: 210
RSVP’d yes: 135
No shows/last minute cancellations: 10
We had a lot of out of state family that we invited but knew would likely not be able to make it. We also had a lot of people not come because they didn’t want to come to a gay wedding, which is surprising given that we only invited those we considered friends and family. I'm glad we had the time to celebrate with those who made it, especially our out of towners, as it was really special seeing them.
The guest list was super stressful; my wife had 40 family members she didn’t even recognize on the list after her parents gave her their names. I didn’t realize this was the case until after the invites went out, I just figured it was all extended family I didn’t know (but she did!) We also had 2 of my family members decide they wanted to come the week of the wedding, and my brother let me know he’d be bringing a +1 two days before the wedding. I regret doing my seating chart so far in advance!
The 10 cancellations/no shows was a huge bummer (that’s like $500 down the drain). 2 was from my aunt, who was at my bachelorette the week before, and we’re still not sure why she didn’t come. 2 were from one of my good friends from high school, who told me the week of that he was in a play that day a few days before the wedding. 3 were because of a family friend with the flu, and 2 were because they got snowed in.
Theme
We had the ceremony in the orchards, and the reception in the barn. I went for a more natural, boho vintage theme, and didn’t do a lot of decorating to let the business of the venue not clash.
Final costs
Venue- $5,822 Schnepf Farms, Big Red Barn
This included all tables, chairs, linens, etc. It also included a hayride during cocktail hour, bonfire in the evening, and lawn games. We had the venue from 4pm-11pm, and got there to decorate around 10am. Venue
Flowers- $135
This is probably the wedding cost I’m most proud of. Our wedding was the day after Valentine’s day, so florist quotes were especially insane. Instead, I made my own bouquets with flowers from Trader Joes. I went on Valentines and picked out my florals. You can order ahead, but they can’t guarantee color, which was most important to me. I made my bouquet, 4 bridesmaids bouquets (1 slightly bigger, MOH), 8 boutonniere, and had cake and hair flowers with enough left over for a couple more bouquets. I used mostly spray roses, greenery, and little “wildflower”-esque items. I love how they photographed! Flowers
S’mores Supplies- $95
This includes enough chocolate and graham crackers for 150 smores, plus extra marshmallows for roasting. I got 3ft long skewers on Amazon, which ended up working out perfectly for safety (kids, drunks) and convenience. Pro tip: if you’re doing a smores bar, get reeces thins; I hate reeces/peanut butter, but everyone remarked about how perfect they were for the smores! Smores
Decor- $467
I did faux flowers for my centerpieces because I wanted to be able to do them ahead of time. I started shopping in October at Michael’s, and after about a week, things started getting really hard to find--they were already switching out to winter florals! In a panic, I went to over 10 Michael’s locations. However, I ended up with extra centerpieces.
I got my vases from Goodwill over a few months. I wanted a mismatched, vintage look, so I got different crystal and green tinted vases and love how it turned out. I also bought a few sheets of lace to drape over tables, and acrylic stands for the table numbers I made. The table numbers turned out surprisingly good considering my terrible handwriting! Centerpieces
Signs- $80
I was planning on DIY-ing my signs, and my FIL got us sheets of acrylic to do so. At the last minute, I chickened out and had someone I found on a local Facebook page do them. She did our seating chart, welcome sign, s’mores sign, and guest book. I probably should have done these myself, as I was not very happy with the end result. They were very smudgey, uneven, and not how I wanted. She re-did them once, but I kept them the way they were after. I didn’t really notice during the wedding, though, and they photographed well--it turned out to be one of the least important things that Pinterest convinced me I need! Signs
Harp- $750
Our harpist was amazing! We won a free cocktail hour package at a bridal expo, so we just had to pay for the ceremony. We also paid to do custom songs (First Day of my Life-Bright Eyes and Dear Theodosia-Hamilton). It turns out she’s our neighbor, and we actually hang out now! Everyone thought we were the bougiest for having a harp, and she sounded amazing. Harp
DJ- $1000
So the best vendor of the night award definitely goes to our DJ. He was absolutely amazing. Not only did he nail the music, but he was so on top of everything else throughout the night and is the reason I didn’t lose my mind. He revised my timeline so that everything made the most sense, handled things with our day of coordinator (she worked for the venue and I was on the verge of tears talking to her half the day), and I even saw him helping my grandpa to his seat at one point in the night (my grandpa was being a huge jerk to everyone, but apparently him and my DJ are now besties). Our photographer wouldn’t let people record things for some reason (??? she wasn’t doing video! They were trying to record things like the shoe game and she told them to put their phones away) so we were heartbroken that we didn’t have any of the day on video, but he sent us an audio clip of the whole ceremony. Cannot say enough good things about him! DJ
Jumpsuit- $300
My wife wore a black jumpsuit from Sezane. It fit perfectly and was super cute. There's a little cutout in the back, but you can't really see it in any of the photos. Jumpsuit
Dress- $980
My dress was from Anomalie, and I got it during a 4th of July promo they were having (15% off). It was actually my third dress--I got hit hard with dress regret. I wanted sleeves and an open back, so I went with Anomalie to make sure I got this. The process was super smooth until I actually got my dress, and it didn’t fit at all. The sleeves were too short and I couldn’t lift my arms! I emailed Anomalie and they agreed to remake me a new bodice, and then pay for a local tailor to sew it on. They sent it, and this one fit even worse! With limited time, they said that they’d pay for whatever alterations were needed to make it fit. In the end, I felt the fit was a bit awkward, but everyone complimented my dress all night. Anomalie paid my alterations the day I sent the invoice, so I can’t fault their customer service at all. Dress
Alterations- $350 (plus $480)
The Anomalie alterations were $480, and I think that was underpriced for the amount of work and reconstruction she had to do to the dress. However, those were paid for by Anomalie. The hem, bustle, and steaming were $350. My tailor was absolutely amazing. She was calm and confident throughout the whole process, and worked a miracle on what seemed like a hopeless dress. Because of her, I was able to lift my arms!! I would recommend her 1000x over.
Photography- $1520
Our photographer. I’m really disappointed by the way she treated us during the wedding (and even leading up to it). She was impossible to get ahold of via email. She made it seem like we were bothering her any time we wanted a picture of something. She rushed us through our couples portraits, and wouldn’t let me do pictures in a gorgeous spot I really wanted to do because we “didn’t have time before the grand entrance.” Then, we got back to the reception area and had to wait 15 minutes for everyone to be ready for our entrance. We added an extra hour to our package for $250 that we didn’t end up using, but I never asked her for it back because I feel so uncomfortable talking to her. However, I'm so happy with our photos! I've been stressing since the wedding about whether or not I would like them, but they really are great. A few favorites
Dinner and Bar- $9517 (Bar $4211, Dinner $4756, Apps $550)
We did a taco bar for our dinner, and it was a huge hit. Everyone loved it, and they had enough for plenty of people to get seconds. The only disappointing thing is that they changed their potato tacos from the time of the tasting--I’m a vegetarian, so this was really important to me. At the tasting, they had crispy, fried potatoes that were the best tacos I’ve ever had. I’ve been dreaming of them since. At the wedding, they had soggy, sauteed potato tacos.
For the bar, we did just beer and wine, as the venue isn’t licensed for hard liquor. However, this ended up being a good thing, since the venue was about an hour from everyone coming out, and we didn’t want people drinking and driving. They also had white claw!, hard lemonade, and fizzy sangria, so there were some fun drinks mixed in. Food & Drink
Cake- $180
We had a 4 tier naked vanilla cake with honey buttercream and fresh berry filling. We were way under charged for the cake--it was a family friend who is a baker, and she killed it. We tipped her generously. Cake
HaiMakeup/Nails- $660
MAN is a two bride wedding expensive for the beauty stuff! Our hair and makeup was $280 each, plus $100 total on nails. My wife loved her hair and makeup from day one. I like my hair, though would have liked a looser curl, and the stylist put the flowers in such a cute way. My makeup just didn’t do it for me. I told her I wanted a natural look from day 1, and after 2 trials, she just didn’t nail it. I probably wouldn’t do airbrush if I were to do it again, even though she insisted it doesn’t affect the coverage, and would probably look for someone else for makeup, though they were from the same company so I’m not sure if that would have been a possibility. Hair make up
Photobus- $900
A photobus was at the top of my list for wedding necessities from day one. We booked one right away, but then 2 months before the wedding they cancelled on us. I thought it was hopeless that we’d find another on such short notice, but then a new photo bus company started up that same week. We were their first wedding, and it showed. The pictures printed out with blue or pink stripes and were cut off funny. There was a terrible delay that made most of the pictures blurry. Printing took forever, and they didn’t print extra copies/instruct people to tape copies in the guest book like we’d asked (before the wedding and twice during). Overall, I was super disappointed with our photo bus experience. Photobus
Guest book- $80 (Etsy) Wedding bands- $1000 Accessories (shoes, jewelry, hair piece, custom jacket)- $141 Stationary- $83 Bridesmaid’s dresses- $430 (Azazie, Cyber Monday), Sparklers $150
Misc
What went well:
I was so happy to get our families together! My dad is 1 of 7 kids, and this was the first time he’d seen all of his siblings in over 10 years. The last time they were all together was for my grandfather’s funeral, and a year before for my grandmother’s, so it was a much better gathering this time around.
I already mentioned what an amazing DJ we had, but the music was so fun! I’m not a dancer, but I was out on the dance floor as much as I could be without overheating in my giant dress.
I didn’t want to do personal vows. At all. However, a week before the wedding, my wife had a bit of a freak out moment about how important it was to her that we did them. Given that I’d made most of the wedding decisions, I conceded, and we did vows. Even though I was super nervous, everyone mentioned all night how amazing our vows were. Our DJ said they were the best vows he’s ever heard, and that he cried twice. I’m glad I did them, even if I couldn’t concentrate on the first half of the ceremony because my heart was pounding so hard.
I’m so glad we did the smores bar, it was such a hit! I love roasting marshmallows, and everyone seemed to have a great time with it. I have no regrets here, even if my dress briefly caught fire.
The sparkler send off was a lot of fun! I’m glad we did it, as I was hesitant to spend the money. It was super cute and a great photo op.
What went wrong:
I felt so dizzy/hot from the time that dinner was served to the rest of the night. I already have a heart condition, so I’m sure the excitement/heat/dress didn’t help. Right before our first dance was called, I told my wife I needed to sit down or I was worried I’d pass out--seconds later, we got called to the dance floor, lol. Later in the night, I had to lay down in the bridal suite for about 10 minutes and saw that my heart rate was over 140 after laying there!
The photo bus. I already spilled the tea above, I’m just still really upset about this!
My grandpa, who was supposed to walk me down the aisle, was having a really hard time walking that day and was in a vile mood. He was snapping at everyone and drinking a bit too much. I told the photographer it was unlikely he’d come out for portraits, but it was important to me that I got a few photos with him later in the night. She remarked “well, he doesn’t like me very much.” I explained that it wasn’t her, but I didn’t get my photos with him.
My dad gave an unexpected, impromptu, drunk speech. It was fine, but definitely awkward. The DJ cut the mic as he approached our table, so he just kinda projected his voice.
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Edit: You don't have to ask me twice! Photo Dump
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Wedding Recap: 18k Afternoon Wedding in Albuquerque for 65 guests

First, Pictures!
This is a wedding I planned for my wife. She was the stereotypical bride that always dreamed of a big fancy wedding, but she had no interest in planning it. I was the stereotypical bride that did 99% of the planning, because I had no interest in a wedding for myself but I loved researching and planning and I wanted my wife to be happy. I know a lot of hetero couples have issues with this labor imbalance, but for us it worked perfectly.

Summary

Costs

Venue: $500

Our venue was a historic hotel downtown. We had the welcome evening, the ceremony and the reception here. A lot of our guests stayed at the hotel and commented on how convenient it was for them.
Ceremony Fee: $500 for the ceremony space. We picked the venue specifically for this ceremony space which isn’t available in the evenings, which forced us to have an afternoon ceremony. Worth it.
Reception Venue: fee was waived because we met the minimum spend!

Food & Drinks: $10.5k

$70 per adult, which included a buffet, beewine/soft drinks, and passed appetizers for 1 hour (this price doesn’t include taxes etc). The total for the food including taxes was $6,288.
We hosted a full bar for the whole night in addition to this package, which came out to $3,468.
Dessert: We brought in gelato from Frost for $810. Their standard package feeds 200 people, so at the end of the night there was a TON of leftovers. They packed it up into pint containers for us and held it at their local store for us to pick up the next day. We hosted a lovely post-wedding ice cream social and gave it all away to local friends.

Attire: $1.5k

My attire: $77 I wasn’t too particular about my dress, so I just kind of bought the first dress that I liked (Lulus Awaken My Love in Grey). After I bought it I got a little obsessed and made this pinterest board featuring this dress as a wedding dress.
My alterations: $80 I got it taken in to tea length and fixed the sleeves to fit better.
My accessories: $180 This includes a veil, barefoot sandals, hair vine, and gaffers tape I used as a bra. I also wore a gold locket that my mother gave me when I was a teenager.
Wife’s attire: $259 She ordered a dress from RenzRags which was kind of a hot mess. The bodice was too small and the skirt looked cheap so she ordered a tulle skirt to go over it and a shaper to squeeze her torso. It was a little stressful, but in the end it all worked out.
Wife’s alterations: $60 To alter the dress mentioned above.
Wife’s accessories: $180 She bought nice jewelry for all her body piercings and a crystal flower crown.
Rings: $612 Her ring is a dainty 14k white gold ring with a pink moissanite which I bought on etsy. My ring is a plain 14k gold band that I found while digging in the garden a few years back. They match our personalities pretty well.

Decor: $1.6k

Florals: $877 We went full DIY on the florals. This is a combination of plastic flowers from Michaels, foam roses from Amazon, Sola wood flowers, artificial boutonnieres and flower crowns from Etsy, and 200 feet of real green garlands from Sam’s Club. The garlands were $400 and well worth it; there was enough for all the tables in the reception and to decorate the chairs for the ceremony.
Non-florals at ceremony: $417 Most of this is from the $278 wagon we bought for our young son to ride down the aisle. We also bought bubbles and a round arch.
Non-florals at cocktail hour: $54 The hotel was pretty enough, we just put up a schedule sign so people would know what’s going on. We labeled it “The Gay Agenda” and everyone loved it.
Non-florals at reception: $279 We went with long farmhouse tables so the centerpieces had to be simple. I found some cheap geometric candle holders on amazon, put some flickering LED candles in them, and arranged them around the garlands on the table. There were also a lot of leftover sola wood flowers so we arranged them in the garlands too.

Stationery: $400

Save-the-dates/Programs./Menus: $0 we skipped all of these: save-the-dates because of our short engagement (we just sent out our invitations reallllly early), programs because we had a super short ceremony, and menus because we had a buffet. I don’t think anyone missed them.
Invitations + postage: $245 We just bought something off of Minted. We ended up with like 50 extra invitations somehow, so we probably could have spent a lot less here.
Thank you cards + postage: $100 Again, just something cute from Minted.
Escort cards: $82 Another DIY. We went with named tables, so I bought some nice tree illustrations from Etsy for table cards, made a seating chart spreadsheet that generated the escort cards for me, and printed out the escort cards on some nice cardstock. This seemed like a good idea until I was cutting out the escort cards at 1 AM two days before the wedding. I don’t recommend this unless you have a way to cut paper in bulk.

Other Vendors: 3.8k

Coordinator: $0 The venue includes a venue coordinator and I think that was all we needed. I wasn’t super stoked about the whole wedding thing, but I love planning things. I think if we had an event coordinator I would’ve enjoyed the day less.
Music: $1371 We hired a string duo for the ceremony and a DJ for the reception. I’m really glad we got the string musicians.
Photographer: $1882 This includes 7 hours of shooting, with a second shooter for about 5 of those hours.
Hair Stylist: $8 We didn’t want anything super fancy, so my sister-in-law did both of our hair. The only thing I had to buy was some hair wax (which I will probably never use again). She did a great job!
Make-up Artist (+ trial): 250 This includes two trials and one day-of face. My wife found a local mua who came out and did a trial for us both. I ended up hating it even though she did a great job, so I did my own makeup day-of along with our brides’ maids.
Officiant: $0 Our lovely friend of 10+ years did the ceremony for us as a wedding gift.
Tips: $300 I took out this much for tips and I’m sure it all went to that, but I couldn’t tell you who got what.

Gifts: $150

Wedding party gifts: $150 for bridesmaids boxes. Everyone also got sweet thank-you cards.

Additional Events: 3.7k

Rehearsal Lunch: $1000? I got a reservation at a cafe down the street from the venue and we just all walked over after the rehearsal. I wanted to pay for this, but my dad got to the check before me so I have no idea how much we spent.
Welcome Party: 2.7k Since everyone was coming from out of town, we had a little cocktail party at the venue the night before.

Additional Info

Timeline

We fell in love with this ceremony space but it was only available before 2 PM, and my wife really wanted to have the standard dinner & dancing reception, so our timeline was a little non-traditional:
1:30 Ceremony (we put 1 on the invitations and one of her cousins still missed it, lol)
1:45 Receiving line into cocktail hour+
2-ish to 3:30 Cocktail Hour+
3:45 First dance and parent dances
4:00 Prayer and dinner (we had a buffet)
4:45 Speeches/Toasts, dance floor open
6:00 Dessert, more dancing
10:00 Late night Loteria to finish the night

What Went Well

Pretty much everything. I originally didn’t want a wedding, but in the end I’m glad my wife convinced me into it. I was worried about so much stuff not working out (like our last-minute welcome evening, wonky timeline, super-short ceremony, non-traditional dresses, the seating chart, the dance floor) but all of it turned out perfectly fine. I’m also really glad we played Loteria (mexican bingo) at the end of the night once the crowd had thinned out and everyone was very drunk. Her family plays it a lot at family gatherings so it was a nice way to bring the two sides of our family together!

Things I Would Have Changed

I definitely wouldn’t have DIY’ed the escort cards, it was so much work at the very last minute. We did have some trouble getting people to RSVP, but I think this was mainly cultural, so probably unavoidable (her family’s weddings are usually much more casual and folks just kind of show up).
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Budget/Breakdown: $30k MN July wedding, 100 guests, Long engagement

First of all, PHOTOS!
Background info
We live in Minnesota, were high school sweethearts, and are in our mid-20s. Of the 10 years we’ve dated, we’ve lived together for 5 years and were engaged for 2.5 years. I planned everything myself, and we paid for the wedding ourselves.
Pros of a long (2+ years) engagement:
Cons of a long engagement:
Budget and Gifts
Initial budget: $20k
Final cost: $29k
Our parents/grandparents gave us $17k in total, and gifts from guests totaled $3k.
Guest List
If I had to plan a wedding again, I might elope, only to avoid the guest-list drama.
My guest list: 80
Parents’ guest list: 200+
Guests invited: 125
Guests RSVP’d yes: 101
Guests invited late due to parents begging: 7
Guests who actually attended: 98 (2 of whom RSVD’d no)
Theme
My vague theme was "royal wedding in the park." My inspiration words were, "Colorful, elegant, simple, and classic."
Final Costs
Day-of Coordinator: $1175
If I could only give one piece of advice, it would be to hire a coordinator. Nothing major went wrong, thanks to our coordinator. Neither me nor my family had to lift a finger to set up or tear down. It was an entirely relaxing, wonderful day.
Attire: $4430
In my experience, buying my dress two years before the wedding was great. I recommend waiting to buy your accessories, though. I thought I needed this $500 belt, but by the wedding day, I liked my dress better without it. I only wore it for the reception.
3 bridesmaids skirts (DIY): $230
My dress: $1200
Accessories: $700
Alterations (hem, take in the bust, bustle, add straps): $550
Groom tux and attire (rented from The Black Tux): $200
My ring (excluding engagement ring): $900
His ring: $650
Hair and Makeup: $1200
I let everyone choose whether they got hair and makeup done and how they wanted to look. Everyone but my mom opted in. I disliked the hair stylist I was assigned. Even after after a second trial, my updo was frizzy, sloppy, and coming out before the ceremony. Bridesmaids hair also came out before the ceremony.
My hair and makeup (including a trial): $400
2nd hair trial: $65
3 Bridesmaids and MOG haimake up: $600
Tip: $150
Stationary: $328
I designed and printed our invitation suites myself, which was stupid. The paper I bought wasn’t made for printer ink, so although they looked beautiful at first, most of the ink rubbed off in the mail. In hindsight, I should have had them professionally printed on good paper. I spent hours on those invites--even doing calligraphy for every name and address--just to have them smudge.
STDs from Minted: $118
Invites (DIY): $100
Thank You Cards: $25
Postage: $85
Venue: $3480
Both the ceremony and reception were at a local park with a lovely indoor space.
Counseling: $160
In hindsight, we should have skipped pre-marital counseling. We have a fantastic relationship, but I thought we should try it. We did Prepare-Enrich, which reported we had no weaknesses, and had an hour of therapy. Afterward, the therapist said we could continue but didn’t think we needed to.
Dance Lessons: $80
This covered four dance classes. It was a group class designed for engaged couples practicing for their first dance. We had so much fun! The weekly lessons were like date nights. We had no prior dance experience and learned a ton.
Officiant and License: $515
Food for the drama llamas: Shortly after we got engaged, I asked my distant cousin (a pastor) to marry us and he agreed. Two years went by. I struggled to get him on the phone or talk about logistics. When we did finally talk, he wouldn’t let us get a word in and talked for two hours about how we needed more pre-marital counseling. Two months before the wedding, he said he didn’t feel comfortable marrying us because we live together and aren’t religious. I was annoyed but relieved, and we hired an officiant.
Officiant: $400
Marriage license: $115
Photo and Video: $4575
For videography, I wanted raw footage because I dislike modern wedding videos. Before hiring him, I told our videographer I didn’t want to see things the photographer was already capturing. I wanted him to film stuff I would miss. Candid moments. Family arriving, groomsmen goofing off, my sister carrying my train, my little cousins playing. But instead, he stuck to the traditonal script and filmed bridal party posing for pictures, the ceremony, speeches, and the dance floor. In hindsight, I should have just “hired” a friend to be the videographer. On the other end of the spectrum, our photographer was incredible!
Photography: $3800
Videography: $775
Food and drink: $5815
Many people doubted my decision to have tacos for dinner and donuts for dessert (no cake). (At least DH was super excited about the food I picked!) I defended my decisions, and it turned out great.
Appetizers and buffet dinner: $4155
Donuts: $220
Open bar (beer and wine only): $1440
DJ/entertainment: $1125
In addition to a DJ, we had ping pong and a retro arcade cabinet (both borrowed from DH’s uncle), which people enjoyed. I’m sad DH and I never got a chance to play.
Decor: $1370
I won’t go into the saga that was finding cylinder vases and pillar candles for a reasonable price. The lesson is to do all DIY as early as possible. Just do it now because it will not go as planned and you’ll have to resort to plan B (or C or D.)
Chair rental cost surprised me. We needed 100 basic chairs for 20 minutes, and most vendors quoted me $1k. My friend’s dad rents chairs for graduation parties but was willing to do weddings too, so I got a deal. If you’re looking for basic chairs, try searching for grad party rentals instead of wedding rentals.
Vases and candles: $50 and my sanity
Blue goblets from eBay: $540
Ring box: $40
Ceremony arch (DIY): $45
Place cards (DIY): $20
Paper cranes (DIY): $5
Fake greenery for headtable: $100
Chair rental for ceremony: $570
Floral: $2440
Flowers on ceremony arch: $400
Floral centerpieces: $100 each
Greenery centerpieces: $50 each
My bouquet: $300
Bridesmaids bouquets: $150 each
Boutonnieres: $15 each
Corsages for moms: $30 each
We had some random buds scattered on other tables too, which were $50 per table. The rest is taxes and delivery fee.
Gifts: $75
I gave my bridesmaids silk butterfly clips from Etsy to wear in their hair. DH gave his dad and groomsmen custom flasks. To each of the parents, I wrote heartfelt notes.
Bridesmaids gifts: $25
Groomsmen gifts: $50
Parent gifts: $0
Honeymoon: $2300
Four days in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. We’ve been there several times before, which meant we didn’t have to plan or research anything. DH grandparents offered the use of their timeshare, so hotel was free. We waited too long to book flights, so they got expensive.
Hotel: $0
Flights: $1800
Food/activities: ~$500
What Went Well
When we started planning, DH and I had a conversation about expectations. I asked, “What makes it a wedding to you?” His answer surprised me, and it helped me prioritize things while planning.
Hiring a day-of coordinator was the best money spent.
I was worried about being sick with anxiety all day. My mom told me if I expected myself to be anxious, I would be. I took her advice and actively corrected my thinking. I pictured myself calm and happy as often as possible. In moments of stress, I focused on things I was excited about. In the weeks leading up, I told myself over and over I would be at ease and carefree. And it was so! I couldn’t believe it!
If it’s going to be hot and you’re doing photos outside, bring cooling towels. Our bridal party loved them in between pictures.
If you don’t want to do something, then don’t. No one will miss it. We skipped a lot of “traditions” and no one noticed. We had no guestbook, cake cutting, father-daughter dance, bouquet toss, garter toss, grand entrance, or grand exit.
We did a receiving line, and it was the best. It got the hugs and congrats done right away and ensured we greeted every guest. It only took about twenty minutes. Then, at the reception, we were free to mingle with whomever we wanted to talk to more. No one pulled us aside or interrupted us during the reception.
Instead of a father-daughter dance, my dad played accordion and guests participated in a group folk dance. It meant a lot of my dad. It was also a sneaky way to get a lot of people on the dance floor for when the DJ started.
I was surprised by how much power the bride has. I realized this when people on the dance floor mimicked my moves and responded to everything I did. If I clapped my hands to the beat, so did they. If I left the floor, they stopped dancing. If I pointed at someone across the floor, they pointed back and we sang lyrics together. As a shy person, I’ve never experienced anything like this. Once I realized my power, I used it for good. I made a point to dance with people who had no date or knew no one. I thanked and complimented people profusely. I visited more tables than I normally would have.
What Went Wrong
The list below is nitpicking for the sake of this post. I mean it when I say the day was absolutely perfect and nothing on the list below affected our happiness.
Finally, I just want to say thank you to this wonderful community. I got a lot of ideas and support from this fantastic group. This place is unique among subreddits and online communities. Please never change, Weddit!
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diy wedding reception table centerpieces video

HOW TO DIY A CELEBRITY WEDDING *for cheap!* - YouTube DIY Wedding Decorations Dollar Tree DIY Bling Centerpieces Dollar Tree Wedding Centerpiece DIY - YouTube DOLLAR TREE WEDDING CENTERPIECE DIY AND IDEAS 2019 - YouTube DIY WEDDING CENTERPIECE DECOR UNDER $8.00 - YouTube Simple DIY Wedding Decor Centerpieces, Signs, Party ... DIY WEDDING TABLE DECOR *SWOONS* - YouTube BEST Dollar Tree Wedding Centerpieces DIY Top 5 Bling ... My First Wedding Event Diy- wedding decor - YouTube DIY dollar tree wedding centerpieces - YouTube

The perfect DIY project for a crowd, choose a vessel you’d look forward to reusing after the wedding, and plant flowers or herbs for an eco-friendly, cash-saving centerpiece. 34 Affordable ... 63 Gorgeous DIY Wedding Centerpieces Whether you want to craft floral masterpieces, make simple arrangements look fab or go flower-free, we’ve got the DIY for you. Keep in mind: Price and stock could change after publish date, and we may make money from these links. DIY Network offers unique ideas for creating floral and non-floral centerpieces for a wedding reception. These are super wedding table centerpieces for summer weddings! We trust that this collection of 40 DIY wedding centerpiece ideas has inspired you to find your perfect table centerpiece. Make sure your wedding centerpieces complement the rest of your wedding decor, so they won’t look out of place. Aug 14, 2018 - Create the wedding of your dreams with these DIY centerpieces for reception tables. Pretty simple to create, and able to add your own touch!. See more ideas about wedding centerpieces, centerpieces, wedding. If you’re looking for DIY wedding centerpieces on a budget, you’ll be happy to know, there are a lot of options! Learn how to create a whimsical wedding centerpiece with this simply how-to video from Afloral. They look perfect for a summer wedding! If you want to have creative DIY wedding flowers, here’s the perfect idea for you. 3. Add a homemade and personal touch to your wedding with these DIY wedding centerpieces. There's a style of DIY wedding centerpiece for every wedding theme! Close. Follow Us. Close. Enter your search here ... This is an adorable and easy way to build an awesome wedding table with a sense of a humor. Fill a bowl with legos and stick in a sweet ... DIY centerpieces can help you save up for other aspects of your wedding, as well as let you take the reins to make something all your own. Ahead, ideas for adding personality and a homemade touch ... 21 Ideas for Diy Centerpieces for Wedding Reception. Get motivated with DIY wedding event tasks for flowers in enjoyable containers such as pitchers, vintage bottles as well as buckets; floral headbands; flower floor tile table runners; as well as conventional or hoop wedding event arrangements. DIY centerpieces can help you save up for other aspects of your wedding, as well as let you take the reins to make something all your own. Ahead, ideas for adding personality and a homemade touch to one of the prettiest parts of your wedding reception décor.

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HOW TO DIY A CELEBRITY WEDDING *for cheap!* - YouTube

Hello DIY Queens! Three piece Bling Centerpiece, Bling Chargers, and a Bling Table Number frame for your fabulous Bling Wedding Reception Tables. Items from ... More wedding DIY's! This time we're tackling what Becky's table layout is going to look like. Specifically working on a gorgeous floral centrepiece. Thanks t... Social media ️ Instagram : https://instagram.com/noozay_decor Pinterest: https://pin.it/pjplsu555sonec Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Noozay-Decor-21762... HI ANGELS! I'M GETTING MARRIED!(to my shoes lol.) In the spirit of the wedding season and inspired by the over the top celebrity kardashian weddings, I am s... Hello everyone! if you're looking for a wedding arrangement that's elegant, simple and easy to make this is the centerpiece for you.Material:Rose: Hobby Lobb... BEST Dollar Tree Wedding Centerpieces DIY . Top 5 Bling Wedding CenterpiecesCan you believe these beautiful decorations are made with items from Dollar Tree?... Dollar tree WEDDING CENTERPIECE DIY Hi friends! Today I am creating 3 beautiful glam wedding centerpieces and a red rose kissing ball! All items were purchas... 0:10 Wedding Centerpieces2:09 Wedding Party Favours3:10 Wedding Welcome Sign4:27 Wedding Non-Traditional Guest BookWedding Stationary: https://paperrose.caHU... Follow me on Instagram:http://www.instagram.com/bargainbethanyDOLLAR TREE HOME DECOR PIECE MENTIONED IN VIDEO (UPLOADED JANUARY 14,2019): https://www.youtube... Tall crystal centerpiece Two tall beer glasses from dollar tree Two medium sizes fish bowls from dollar tree Decorative filler from Michael White flowers fro...

diy wedding reception table centerpieces

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